


Curb Crawling

by Severus1snape



Series: Draco Malfoy´s Awkward Muggle Innuendos [3]
Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Betaed, Humor, M/M, Misunderstandings, Oblivious Draco Malfoy, Slang
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-09-20
Updated: 2019-09-20
Packaged: 2020-10-24 21:22:36
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 918
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20712740
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Severus1snape/pseuds/Severus1snape
Summary: When Muggle Studies become mandatory for the returning eighth years at Hogwarts, Harry was not expecting Draco Malfoy to start hitting on him. Or - the one where Draco Malfoy really has no idea what he's actually saying.You should read parts one and two first.





	Curb Crawling

**Author's Note:**

> The one where Draco Malfoy is told Curb Crawling (Muggle slang for using prostitutes) means actual walking!
> 
> My Beta is the lovely and talented [Snarry5evr](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Snarry5evr)

**Three**

“Excuse me?!” Harry squawked at Malfoy when the Slytherin had spoken to him in the library an hour before curfew on this particular Friday at the beginning of November.

A blond eyebrow elegantly raised at Harry's tone of voice; Malfoy leaned back against the chair he had sat down in. He studied Harry's flushed face for another moment before leaning closer, whispering: “Potter, did you… perhaps you should get yourself checked into… you´re acting like you´ve… lost your mind.” 

Harry scowled in return, crossing his arms aggressively across his chest. “ _ I ́m _ not the one doing _ that  _ kind of thing, Malfoy!” 

Shaking his head in disbelief that Harry would turn the tables around, Malfoy spoke softly. “I have no idea what you´re talking about, Potter.”

“You can't possibly be serious, Malfoy!” Harry stated alarmed. “You were the one asking me if I… If…  _ God _ , Malfoy…”

“Merlin, Potter. You ́d think I had asked for your hand in marriage... It's a walk, not a proposal!” Malfoy was getting louder; both males were glancing around to see if Madam Pince was on her way to scold them for talking in the first place. But she was usually not around after dinner time these days; after the War.

“A walk!?” Harry was getting hysterical now, and he didn't care that he was. What Malfoy was proposing was preposterous. It was insane. It was-

“All I did was ask if you wanted to go Curb Crawling with me before curfew, Potter. It's not a crime. Yet, you´re acting as though it is.” Malfoy tapped his foot impatiently against one of the legs of his chair while waiting for Harry's explanation.

“Of course, it's a crime, Malfoy! People get arrested if they are caught… doing that…” Harry licked his lips, not meeting the grey eyes of the Slytherin now. “And I don't want my first… to be that way at all.”

Malfoy waited for Harry to finish. When it was clear that he had finished speaking Malfoy scoffed. “First what, Potter? Surely you´re joking?”

“Some of us want to make that special with the right sort of person,” Harry hissed back, getting agitated with the blond's attitude.

Malfoy stood, righting his clothes. “Fine, Potter. I see how it is.”

“What? Oh come on, you weren't  _ really _ expecting me to go with you.”

Eyes narrowing, Malfoy stared down his nose at Harry. “Obviously, or I would not have asked. Don't worry, Potter, I shall not make that mistake any more.” Malfoy then turned around to leave, but Harry was quick to catch his arm before he got away.

“I didn't mean to offend you, Malfoy.” And he didn't; he hadn't. He actually found this new Malfoy refreshing, and he was acting as though he was remorseful of his past mistakes. He had even apologized to some of those he had been the meanest towards.

Harry fidgeted on the spot, where he too had stood in an effort to stop Malfoy from leaving. Why he wasn't too sure at the moment. He just knew letting him go away angry would be a mistake. “I just - no one I know has ever spoken so freely about… that before. You just caught me off guard, I guess. Sorry,” he mumbled and tried his best to ignore the blush his cheeks still sported as he met Malfoy's scrutinizing gaze.

Crossing his arms across his chest, Malfoy smirked. “I know how lacking your vocabulary is, Potter, but surely not every Gryffindor has your standards? Enlighten me then; how does the Great Harry Potter speak of  _ walking around _ Hogwarts ́s grounds?”

_ What? Is he - he cannot be… he's talking about  _ actually _ walking?!  _ Harry was beginning to hyperventilate. _ Jesus fuck. I  _ am _ a bloody pervert! What was I thinking… how could I possibly have misheard him this much?!  _ “Er,” clearing his throat Harry said. “You, you meant walking? Like actual-”

“One foot in front of the other?” Malfoy, the git, finished when Harry seemed unable to.

Harry was mortified.  _ Merlin, how thick was he? Surely he wasn't this dumb? This perverted that he twisted everything Malfoy said to him into something… god, he needed to get laid! _

“Potter! Snap out of it. I have no intention of you fainting on me, leaving me here with you unconscious so the rest of the school believes I cursed you.” Malfoy sounded nervous now; Harry simply couldn't figure out why.

“You didn't ask me to walk around the grounds with you, Malfoy.”

“Sure I did, Potter!” Malfoy argued, he always had to get the last word in.

“No!” Damn it, Malfoy was annoying. “You… you asked if I wanted to go Curb Crawling with you!” he hissed the words softly, so he was sure - should Madam Pince have decided today was the day she was patrolling her library - that he couldn´t be heard speaking such words.

“So?” Malfoy simply responded.

“So!?” And now Harry was back to squawking. “Malfoy! It means… You´re asking me if I want to go visit a… a…”

“A what, Potter?! Merlin help me, if-”

“A prostitute!”

Malfoy's face had flushed a cute - er - pink color now; clearly he had had no idea. “I am going to bloody  _ murder  _ Finch-Fletchley _ !”  _

Harry gaped at Malfoy's back as he left the library, green eyes trailing down to Malfoy's hips. Snapping his eyes back up, Harry wondered if he should tell the Slytherin just how much he swings his - er, nope, probably not too wise!


End file.
